Why our view of how life works keeps changing?
So many philosophers across generations have tried to define what life means, what good life means, how life works and so on. We can read all of that but eventually we subconsciously form our own life philosophy all the time in the given context of our life.
Psychology and Philosophy are greatly intertwined subjects. One is about understanding how mind works and other how life works. The more we become conscious about our minds; more we have a viewpoint on how life works. And same is true the other way around. Since our mind is anything but static, our life philosophy also keeps changing along.
Few years back I started noting down my life philosophy based on my learnings from different teachers and my own observations of what I was observing at any point of time. Over a period, I see how my viewpoint keeps changing all the time. When I analyzed, I found a trend that my life philosophy was very much driven by where my mind attention was. Attention can be only at one place at a time. It is sometimes focused on my work, on others, on circumstances, on desires or on myself. Here are some viewpoints I formed on each one of them.
On my work
Work takes our unwarranted attention when it becomes serious business to win at any cost. If we look closely, all pressure is self-created. Our mind likes to struggle otherwise there is no struggle. We think we will win if we are serious. Though it most like counterproductive. Winning required our intensity and not seriousness. Intensity comes when we are present. Indirectly, our work becomes an opportunity to practice living in now. Instead of looking at tasks as what we like or don't like, can we try to see what is required to do in front of us right now? If there is nothing to do, can we rest? Can we conserve our energy, why to stand when we can sit and why to sit when we can lie down?
Our mind gets stuck with outcomes without defining what does success mean for us as a person. Success is living in alignment with who you are. This simply means living your values. Work is not about building business but to actively and consciously search for the work you want to keep doing irrespective of outcomes. Searching for work worth doing is the real work. Walk on an aspirational journey instead of an ambitious journey as it allows you to discover ourselves more and more. This path allows to find your deepest values and gives us a direction to remain honest with ourselves. So, in a way success is also a discipline of not doing what we consider against your values. Happiness is not an outcome but an input of how we take decisions based on our values. We don’t have to find shortcuts. When we sow with love and wait for the fruit to ripe, it will be sweet.
On my relationship with others
When we don't like any person, possibility is that we have not spend enough quality time with him or her. We identify others through their mind which will always have flaws, just like ours. How others behave with us is never personal, it is just how their minds are. But when we are also operating from our heads, we take it personal. There is no malaise in the world, there is only confusion. Noone is broken; it is only wrong identification. Our relationship with anyone or anything will be same as our relationship with ourselves. We identify ourselves also as our mind and don’t know who we truly are. Our true self is same as others however our minds are at different stages of evolution.
Our suffering in relationships is because of self-obsession which causes our disconnects from others. Our own traumas and past when not healed comes in the way. When pain is not transformed, it gets transmitted. It shows up specially when we are with our closed ones. If you think you are enlightened, go and spend a week with your family. Once we start working on our own healing journey, we start flowering and start living from our heart space. We can start serving others only from this overflow or when we are flowering ourselves in love. Love is even more powerful than electricity. It is the generous person who is the wealthiest. Generosity is not an outcome but a skill which needs to be practiced every day.
On my circumstances
Life itself becomes a psychological experience when we live in our heads all the time. From this space, we fear everything and think of the worst-case scenarios. We mistake ropes as snakes. But when we look carefully, we realize everything is just a rope. There is no snake at all. Unfortunately, we have to go through the hell to realize that there is no hell. How can we enjoy going through the hell? When we enjoy the bungee jump, fear just disappears.
Life is like a stock market at any given point, it is always right irrespective what would you consider with in your perspective. We may feel lost in understanding how the entire system works. Getting lost simply means that the world has become larger than your knowledge of it.
On my desires
Notice what are we talking or thinking about most of times, highly likely we are identifying ourselves with that topic. If gone unnoticed, the same turns into our strong desire. Desire becomes like a contract we do with ourselves to be unhappy till we get that something. It is only mind who just wants a little engagement. Easiest solution to any problem is to give our mind an alternate problem and then see how earlier problem disappear.
Our true self doesn’t want anything except peace of mind. Peace of mind means being present. Being present means to be drama free. Drama free means to take our mind less seriously. If you can laugh on your thoughts, you don’t need a therapist ever. Our true self desire is to here now. Time is the new status symbol. First of all, we need to let go of the concept of urgency in our lives. When we slow down, we forego the grip of the past and future.
Desires in itself are not bad, and it is infact good if they get fulfilled. But question is how we are if they do not get fulfilled? Can we be fine with all results? When we fail, it was supposed to fail. How do we know this? Because it has failed. Can we act as it everything is in your control knowing very well that nothing is in your control. Ultimate goal of life is to heal ourselves of all liking and disliking’s. Can we practice wanting what we have and don’t want what we don’t have? Can we be detached with both what we want to do and what we have to do? It is that simple. Ultimate freedom is freedom from dualities. Keep refining the life till we can say that I am pleased with everything in life and today is a good day to die.
On my Self
We cannot choose to be ourselves. The most we can do is get still. Stillness taps into the wisdom. To become still, we first may have to question our thoughts relentlessly. Only consistency of effort to question and patience of refinement can cleanse the mind and bring this self-transformation and allow to live us authentically.
Authenticity is about knowing ourselves honestly and act accordingly. Knowing ourselves is a two-step process. First is to know more than hundred things about ourselves and second is knowing you are none of them. First is understanding your mind. Second is to know you are not your mind. After climbing the stairs, you have to leave it to reach the roof. The roof is our home. The roof is our beingness. Here we realize that just being alive is enough, everything else is a bonus. At this consciousness, we can always smile at any situation or suffering just like a watching an interesting movie. Being at ease or not at ease is not the key, but to be able to see the situation. When you don’t have an identity there is nothing to protect. After this, we can see the journey is from “now to now” and realizing “that is that”.
Where is your attention right now? Thank you for reading
